The quote “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results” is often attributed to Albert Einstein, but it actually came from novelist Rita Mae Brown. I must admit I liked it better when I thought it was Einstein’s, but coming from a novelist doesn’t make it any less true. And nowhere is it more true than in education.

Look at a 1971 Cadillac, the top-of-the-line American car of its day and compare it to a self-driving Tesla. The development and change have been more than dramatic. As an old Star Trek fan, I notice the same thing watching reruns: in many ways we’ve already surpassed what those writers could even imagine. Captain Kirk used a flip phone.

Almost everything has changed dramatically over the last fifty years, with one glaring exception: education. I can think of nothing that has progressed slower. Long-term trends in educational outcomes show a graph that is virtually a straight line from 1971 to today.

Why Education Is Stuck

There are many contributing factors. A few of the biggest:

• Self-perpetuating training. Most professors in college departments of education are themselves graduates of the very programs they now teach, preserving the same practices decade after decade.
• Questionable curriculum and resistance to choice. There are little real competition and little willingness to let parents choose what works.
• Lack of parental involvement. Many homes have effectively been removed from the educational equation.
• Homework that does more harm than good. Schools try to make up for ineffective use of the six hours a child is in class by sending more work home, often with negative results.
• Teach, test, forget. Material is taught, tested once, and for the most part never revisited, so it never truly enters long-term memory.

One Size Fits No One

But high on my list as to why progress has been so minimal is that our schools are still focused on set curricula, one-size-fits-all education. What is taught is grade or class dependent, not student dependent. In any classroom, at any grade level, there can easily be a disparity of two, three, or even more years in students’ academic levels, with similar differences in their processing levels. A child’s processing level determines how much of what they hear, read, or see they can actually take in, understand, and assimilate.

What Targeted Education Looks Like

At NACD, we see every day what targeted education can do: education tailored to the individual. Targeted education means teaching the child at their level in each subject, tailoring instruction to the child’s processing level, leveraging the principles of neuroplasticity, and providing targeted input with sufficient frequency, intensity, and duration until the information moves into long-term memory and is associated with other things the child has learned. Developing processing abilities changes the whole picture and the child’s future.

Parents, You Don’t Have to Wait

Changing a system that doesn’t really want to change is going to take a long time. But parents, you don’t have to wait. Consider taking charge: if possible, bring your kids home and provide them with a targeted, tailored education. It can accelerate your child’s learning, turn them into active learners and readers, and yes, make them smarter.

If you’d like to learn how NACD can help you build an individualized program for your child, visit nacd.org or contact us directly. The system may not change in time. Your child doesn’t have to wait.

Reprinted by permission of The NACD Foundation, Volume 40 No. 1 , 2026 ©NACD

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The recently released ‘Make America Healthy Again” (MAHA) report, spearheaded by Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr., presented a critical examination of the factors contributing to the decline in the health of American children. The report identifies several key areas of concern that align closely with the mission of the National Association for Child Development (NACD).

One of our ongoing efforts for almost half a century has been to educate parents and assist them in their children’s development and education, part of which has included guiding and assisting them in addressing dietary and health issues. Every year our experience and data underscore the significance of diet, nutrition, and exercise for general health, as well as the correlation between these pieces and brain function and development. The correlation between these basic physiological pieces and development, mental receptivity, behavior, energy, awareness, sleep, and on and on is unquestionable. In addition, the tremendous number of children we have worked with internationally has strongly indicated a causative relationship between environmental toxins, immunizations, and neurodevelopmental issues such as autism, ADHD, and global developmental delay being high on the list. Research is indicating that there are multigenerational and transgenerational effects of toxins in our environment and foods that can produce developmental issues in our children, but also disorders such as asthma, obesity, and cardiovascular diseases.

One of our roles is helping parents understand that they are responsible for their child’s diet and exercise and providing them with the expertise and support to make the needed changes. Some children come to us with absolutely horrendous diets.  Many decades ago I was puzzled by the number of low functioning children who would eat nothing other than McDonald’s fries, chicken nuggets, or burgers. Most of these children would not have known Ronald McDonald from the president and would not or could not attend to TV and be influenced by advertising or peers. We assumed there was something in this food that had the children hooked. It turned out it was sugar.  Between addiction to things from gluten to sugar and the tendency of children to get stuck in behavior patterns, many parents were unwilling or able to modify their child’s diet. Working with the whole child and the family, we were able to guide and coach the parents so that they could break addictions and patterns, as well as modify the child’s senses of taste and smell and even increase their cognitive function to increase the child’s reasoning ability. Without comprehensive help many parents are lost as to how to make the necessary changes. Changing a stubborn or addicted child’s diet, getting them away from screens and moving is often perceived by parents to be a futile task. And truth be known, many parents have neither the expertise nor support to make these changes, and as a result they do their best to try to convince themselves that it’s neither possible nor important. Creating healing healthy diets and exercise is not only possible, it’s vital not only to the child’s function and behavior today, but to their future development, health and even their longevity.

Changing addictions and behavior patterns may not be simple, but it’s often a lot easier than many parents believe. But parents need a lot of guidance and support to do it. It can be done, and it is not only important, but often required if we are going to help the children become what they can and should be.

Children are not responsible for creating good diets and exercise programs, their parents are.

We have prepared a summary of the Make America Health Again report, and we encourage everyone to review it. It’s important!

Our Summary

On May 22, 2025, the MAHA (“Make America Healthy Again”) Commission—led by HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr.—released its Make Our Children Healthy Again Assessment, spotlighting four main drivers behind the rise in chronic health conditions among American children:

1.  Ultra‑Processed Foods

• Nearly 70 percent of children’s daily calories now come from ultra‑processed foods—high in sugars, refined grains, industrial fats, additives, and dyes.
• These diets are tied to obesity, diabetes, learning and behavior challenges, sleep issues, and weakened cognitive abilities.
• The report urges reconsideration of dietary guidelines and federal food programs to reduce processed food consumption. org+14whitehouse.gov+14fabbs.org+14mofo.com+1adhdevidence.org+1

2.  Environmental Chemicals

• Children face daily exposure to tens of thousands of synthetic chemicals—PFAS, pesticides, microplastics, heavy metals, and even electromagnetic radiation.
• The report links these exposures to developmental delays, endocrine disruption, and metabolic problems, calling for stronger oversight, cumulative-impact studies, and stricter regulation.org+2whitehouse.gov+2wlj.net+2

3. Sedentary Lifestyles, Screen Time & Chronic Stress

• The increase in screen time—up to nine hours a day—is coupled with reduced physical activity, poor sleep, and increasing stress and anxiety.
• These factors contribute significantly to obesity, mental health issues, and behavioral problems. MAHA places equal emphasis on lifestyle and dietary concerns.org+2americanactionforum.org+2fabbs.org+2adhdevidence.org+7mofo.com+7americanactionforum.org+7

4. Over‑Medicalization

• The assessment warns against excessive prescribing of psychiatric medications, antibiotics, acid suppressants, and emerging weight-loss drugs for children.
• It flags insufficient long-term safety data, lax oversight, and undue influence from pharmaceutical interests, advocating for enhanced informed consent and post-market monitoring.

What NACD Families Can Do Now

• Opt for whole foods—eliminate processed snacks, dyes, and excess sugars from meals.
• Reduce toxin exposure—choose cleaner produce, limit plastic use, filter water, and avoid pesticides.
• Promote movement & healthy routines—encourage outdoor activity, limit screen time, establish consistent sleep patterns, and manage stress.
• Vet medical interventions thoughtfully—research prescriptions and vaccines, seek second opinions, and engage in informed decision-making.
• Stay engaged and advocate—keep track of MAHA’s next moves and support measures that promote healthier schools, cleaner environments, and safer food.

Bottom Line

MAHA confirms what NACD has always emphasized: the profound impact of diet, environment, lifestyle, and prudent healthcare choices on child development. Though not without flaws, the report offers a compelling framework to shift national policy toward prevention and family empowerment. NACD stands ready to guide families in turning these insights into real-world, healthy practices.

• Reprinted by permission of The NACD Foundation, Volume 3 No. 4, 2025 ©NACD

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I just returned from my annual trip to the beautiful pastoral mountains of Transylvania. Once a year I travel to the family friendly resort Cheile Gradistei to see our Eastern European families whom we work with via Zoom throughout the year. Over the course of the three weeks, my staff and I met with about 50 families who were able to join us. Some of these families we have worked with for over a decade. One of these is the Spatariu family, who has done a terrific job with their lovely daughter, Monica. Monica is a model for families with children who have Down syndrome.

Monica is now thirteen, and we have been helping her since she was eleven months old. Monica is in Romanian public school, and her parents work with her around her mandatory school hours. Monica is and has always been in a typical class, and on recent national testing received all A’s. She is proud to be at the top of her English class at school. The only thing I heard regarding issues at school was that Monica tends to argue with the boys because she doesn’t like how they behave. I gave her a point for that. Monica, like many of my children over there, gives me the great compliment of working hard on her English at least partially so she can speak with me. I still can’t speak Romanian or Bulgarian or any of the other languages my kids over there can speak.

During Monica’s evaluation I asked if I could record her speaking English. I wanted to be able to share how well she was doing with her second language. Her English is already dramatically better than my Spanish was after two years of Spanish in high school and another in college. My intention was to ask her a simple question and record a brief sample of her English to share with our speech pathologist. As she often does, Monica surprised me with her response to a very simple question, “Monica, tell me about your cat.” I loved her response, which I think speaks volumes of what can be, should be and needs to be.

Our Eastern European families are helping to approach a tipping point in thier respective countries, demonstrating what special needs children, from those labeled as autistic to those with Down syndrome like Monica, can achieve.

Reprinted by permission of The NACD Foundation, Volume 39, No.4 , 2025 ©NACD

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Understanding the Whole Child

To truly understand a child, we must take a top-down approach, viewing them as a complete individual rather than a sum of disconnected parts. Every child is more than a diagnosis, a test score, or an isolated challenge. Yet too often, professionals—whether doctors, therapists, educators, or psychologists—focus on just one piece of the puzzle without seeing how it connects to the whole.

This fragmented approach is much like the classic parable of the three blind men and the elephant, where each man touches a different part of the animal and comes away with a completely different impression. One thinks he’s found a tree trunk, another a snake, another a fan—none of them realizing they are all describing the same elephant. In the same way, when we look at just one aspect of a child’s development without considering the bigger picture, we risk missing their true potential.

Parents, who know their children better than anyone, are often left out of the equation. Yet, they are the experts on their own child and an essential part of any effective intervention. Whether a child has a formal diagnosis or not, each one is unique, complex, and capable of growth beyond expectations—if we take the time to understand them holistically.

The Power of a Top-Down Perspective

One of the first things we teach professionals learning to assess children is to start with the big picture. The first 30 seconds of interaction can often reveal a wealth of insight into a child’s development, personality, and challenges. This top-down approach allows us to quickly identify strengths, pinpoint underlying issues, and develop a roadmap for meaningful progress.

In contrast, starting with individual symptoms or isolated skill sets often leads to a distorted and incomplete understanding of the child. To truly help a child thrive, we must first see who they are as a whole person, then work backward to address the specific areas that need support.

Beyond Labels: Every Child is Unique

Labels can be useful for categorization, but they do not define a child’s potential. Consider:

• Josh, who has a brain injury
• Olivia, diagnosed with Down syndrome
• Jaxon, labeled as being on the autism spectrum
• Lindy, identified with ADHD
• Ryan, considered “typical”
• Lucas, placed in a gifted program

Each of these children is more than their label. They all have complex needs, unique abilities, and untapped potential. When we focus only on the diagnosis, we limit expectations—but when we recognize the whole child, we open the door for extraordinary growth.

Building a Support System for Success

Helping a child reach their full potential requires a coordinated, individualized approach that includes:

• The Child – at the center of the process
• Parents – the true experts on their child’s strengths and needs
• NACD Developmentalist – a trained specialist who designs a customized developmental program based on a holistic assessment
• Family Coach – available nearly seven days a week to provide ongoing support
• The NACD Team – an extended network of specialists with decades of experience and over 3,000 targeted intervention strategies

This team approach ensures that each child receives personalized, strategic input designed to help them develop the skills they need to succeed.

The Truth About Neuroplasticity: No Magic Pills, Just Consistent, Targeted Work

In today’s world, families are bombarded with promises of quick fixes—from supplements to therapies that claim to offer overnight transformations. But the reality is that meaningful change takes time, consistency, and strategic input.

Brain development follows the principles of neuroplasticity—the process by which the brain creates new neural connections and adapts over time. While neuroplasticity offers incredible potential, it does not happen instantly. Real progress requires interventions that follow three critical principles:

1. Frequency – The brain needs repetitive exposure to new information and activities. Ideally, children receive targeted input multiple times per day rather than once or twice per week.
2. Intensity – Learning must be engaging and appropriately challenging to stimulate growth.
3. Duration – Change takes weeks or months, not minutes or days. Sustainable progress requires a long-term commitment.

Unlocking Every Child’s Potential

Every child—regardless of their background, challenges, or strengths—has the potential to exceed expectations when given the right opportunities. The key lies in seeing the whole child, not just their difficulties, and applying customized, targeted strategies that nurture growth at every level.

At NACD, we believe that no child’s future should be predetermined by a label. By focusing on the whole child, working as a team with families, and harnessing the power of neuroplasticity, we help children break barriers, develop skills, and thrive beyond what anyone thought possible.

Reprinted by permission of The NACD Foundation, Volume 39 No. 1 , 2025 ©NACD

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by Bob Doman

Our perception of our children’s potential is limited by what we believe is possible. The opportunities we provide for them reflect that perceived potential, and the opportunities determine the outcomes.

Let me start by getting your attention. I want to introduce you to Ellen, a not-so-typical, “typical” child who just turned 6.  

This list of names Ellen was hearing for the first time and recalling represents her processing and short-term memory; and repeating the names backward represents her working memory, which is exceptional. Ellen’s cognitive function permits her to do amazingly well in everything she does, and she is just getting started.

Ellen’s parents understand neuroplasticity because of what they have seen with her big brother, Coco. Coco is a brilliant ten-year-old who exceeds the perceptions of what the professional world believes could be. However, NACD and Coco‘s parents believe that he has unlimited potential and are providing him with opportunities commensurate with those perceptions. 

Please watch Coco’s demonstration of his working memory. Neither Ellen nor Coco are using memory strategies or tricks; they are using the short-term and working memory that has been developed.

Coco is demonstrating his processing power and working memory. Working memory is now appropriately being called the new IQ. Coco was brain-injured at birth and would be identified as having Cerebral Palsy. However, to his family (who, with NACD’s guidance, is providing all his therapy and education themselves at home), he is their son, Coco. Coco needs no other labels; “Coco” suffices, and he is given the opportunities of a child with unlimited potential. Physically, Coco still has many challenges but has already surpassed traditional expectations and is not stopping.  

Coco’s and Ellen’s parents can see the potential in their children; because they can see it, they are doing everything they can to help them achieve it.

Step 1: Understand that through neuroplasticity, almost anything is possible.

Step 2: Do not be limited by labels & associated baggage.

Step 3: Provide the child opportunities to achieve their unique innate potential.

Note: Coco’s parents read our articles and watched our videos before Coco’s first NACD evaluation and TDI (Targeted Developmental Intervention) Program, which he received just before his second birthday. They understood neuroplasticity and knew that they were responsible for their son’s future and that they needed to be all that they could be. In preparation, they started using our online Simply Smarter program. Both parents developed superior processing and working memory—exceptional parents doing exceptional things. No limits. 

Reprinted by permission of The NACD Foundation, Volume 38 No. 5, 2024 ©NACD

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by Bob Doman

Rewards and consequences are the tools we have as parents, or, for that matter, as a society, to provide feedback, guidance, encouragement, and instruction, and to maintain order. Lack of consistent quality feedback leads to ambiguity, confusion, poor outcomes, and potentially chaos.

We need to reward the behaviors or things our children do that we like and want to see increase. Behaviors we do not like or want also require appropriate feedback. Rewards and consequences are the tools we have, the power we must use to teach our children, encourage them to do more of what we want, and dissuade them from doing things that are harmful or that will negatively impact their lives and futures.

What is a behavior? 

Everything we do can be defined as a behavior. For our children, it’s everything from walking and talking to reading, following directions, complying with requests and rules, and interacting with us and others—essentially, everything they do. 

Sadly, to many, the word “behavior” implies “bad behavior.” “Johnny has a behavior problem.” As stated, virtually everything our children do, whether it is helpful or harmful, is a behavior and is influenced by our response to it.

Feedback

Without feedback, children are in a vacuum, not knowing “Should I?” “Shouldn’t I?” “Does it matter?” or “Who cares?” Lack of quality feedback deprives the child of guidance and produces insecurity, anxiety, doubt, and poor outcomes. Unfortunately, many children receive poor or inconsistent feedback from their parents, schools, and society as a whole. 

Credibility—positive environment

To a significant degree, our influence is determined by our credibility. To create credibility, it is important to establish your primary role as loving, supportive, encouraging, and being on their side. The core of your child’s perception essentially reflects how positive or negative your overall interaction is with them. To have a positive environment, you should create a ratio of positive to negative feedback of 3:1 or 4:1 or greater. Part of the positive-to-negative equation is intensity. The stronger the reaction/feedback intensity, the stronger the impact. Ten smiles or “good” or “nice,” will not, in balance, equal one major hissy fit. Sadly, many parents reserve the intensity for the negative reactions. 

When responding to a behavior, a very important note is that our primary focus is not to specifically encourage or stop that immediate behavior, but to build those behaviors or extinguish them over time. Our measure of success or failure is the long-term results. Are we seeing more of the positive behaviors and less of the negative behaviors? If not, we have not succeeded and need to modify our response and feedback.

Consistency

A phrase often heard by parents from their children is, “It’s not fair.” It’s a safe assumption that you are not being consistent if you hear this from your child. Children seem to have an innate understanding of injustice, and inconsistency is at the top of their list of injustices. “I did this yesterday, and it was okay; why am I being punished for the same thing today?” Consistency is vital to build credibility, not appear unjust, and have the child accept and learn from your response. 

Did you mean it?

Many responses children receive for their “bad” or inappropriate behaviors are what I refer to as the equivalent of a 5-cent speeding ticket. Many of the supposed positive responses are not much stronger. I have referred to intensity as one of the foundational pieces of neuroplasticity. If something happens without sufficient intensity, our brains do not respond or change, and no learning occurs. One of the best gauges of the effectiveness of your responses is whether they worked. I often hear from parents things like, “I keep punishing the behavior, but he still does it.” If this is true, then you have not actually punished the behavior. You may have said or done something but did not punish the behavior. The definition of punishment is a response or consequence to a behavior that decreases the frequency of the behavior. If you haven’t changed it, you haven’t punished it, and doing something negative that doesn’t improve the behavior is cruel, and counterproductive, creates a negative environment, destroys your credibility and effectiveness, and harms your relationship with your child. 

The best consequences are the ones you only need to use once or twice. Do not be afraid when a consequence is warranted to go big. As an example, an age-old consequence has been writing sentences. Johnny picks on his little sister, creating all kinds of issues for the family. His consequence might be to write the sentence 10 times: “I have to be nice to Mary, and I cannot and will not pick on her.” I suspect that for many boys, this task would result in a lot of grumbling, and ten minutes later, they would be finished, and fifteen minutes later, Johnny would be picking on Mary again. What if Johnny had to write that sentence 300 or more times? This would probably take many hours; Johnny will have missed some things he would have liked to do, like his baseball game, and had said to himself 300 times while writing it, “I have to be nice to Mary, and I cannot and will not pick on her.” We call this frequency, and frequency changes the brain, which means learning occurs. Hopefully, this consequence will only be used once or twice to change the behavior.

It should be noted that consequences may only be effective if the overall balance between positive and negative, as mentioned, is 3:1 or 4:1 or greater. In a negative environment, the child may learn that they only get real attention if they do something “bad.” In this scenario, bigger consequences can result in more “bad” or worse behavior.

“Bravo”

We work with many families in Europe, and as we do with all our families, we have them post videos to their NACD Portal showing us how they implement the various activities we give them. When reviewing these videos, the word we often hear as they implement their child’s activities is “Bravo.” “Bravo” is a nice positive word, which essentially means, “Well done.” However, what we often see is “Bravo’’ meaning “you tried but got it wrong,” or “Bravo” meaning “we’re done,” or “Bravo” meaning “let’s do what’s next,” and “Bravo” meaning “good,” or “you did well,” or “you got it right.” In a thirty-second video we could hear ten “bravos.” This is not terribly effective. Although the tone is positive, which we strongly encourage, there isn’t much delineation between positive, negative, and neutral feedback. In such situations, it’s not that we want or need strong negative feedback for getting something wrong; it’s a matter that the positive needs to be much stronger. The response to “wrong” should be simple acknowledgment, such as “Oops, let’s try again,” but the response for getting something correct or done well should be robust and powerful.

Attention

Any attention is potentially reinforcing. Attention must be given with the knowledge that it has the potential to be reinforcing regardless of the intention. Many of our children’s negative behaviors begin as simple attention-getting behaviors. A child’s smile can elicit a smile from Mom. The smile got Mom’s attention, and she smiled back or picked up the child and rewarded the behavior, building that behavior. Johnny burps, and Mom responds, “Johnny, don’t burp.” The burp elicited attention from Mom, which potentially reinforced their behavior. “Johnny, don’t burp” is not a consequence. It’s attention, and any attention from a parent is potentially reinforcing. Of greater consequence are the parent’s response to minor possible hurts—hurts being little physical bumps, to a hurt feeling. If Mom overreacts, picks up the child and loves all over them, the odds are good that the crying doesn’t stop, but increases because of Mom’s attention. This reinforces the child’s overreaction, which essentially is a lie, and can potentially help teach children to lie. These children often become the “drama queens” because it works. Parents mistakenly perceive all the attention they give their children as a display of love and a good thing. Attention must be given judicially, understanding that it can be very influential.

In negative environments, attention gains even greater significance.

Opposite incompatible behaviors

Understanding the concept of opposite incompatible behaviors is very helpful for parents in focusing, creating a positive home environment, and successfully managing and developing their children.

Opposite incompatible behaviors reference the reality that you can’t be good and bad or try and not try, be responsible or irresponsible, etc., simultaneously. In our efforts to create good attitudes, work habits, and other behaviors, we always want to be aware of the opposite incompatible behaviors and focus primarily on building and reinforcing the positive preferred behaviors. This applies across the board, from behavior problems that need to be turned around to increasing focus on academics or responsibility with chores. When possible, focus on building what we want with positive attention/rewards, and when we need to use consequences, do so effectively and judicially.

• Create a positive environment.
• Provide consistent, definitive feedback.
• Be cognizant of the power of attention.
• Focus on rewarding the behaviors you want to build.

Reprinted by permission of The NACD Foundation, Volume 37 No. 3, 2024 ©NACD

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This is our 5th year meeting in Transylvania and something our families and staff look forward to each year. This year about 50 families were able to come from all over Eastern Europe and beyond to have their children receive their triannual evaluations and have their NACD programs updated. It was also an opportunity for our families to spend some time together at the beautiful Cheile Gradistei resort and to learn, play, interact, rejuvenate, and create new bonds and friendships. These two weeks are Bob’s favorite time each year; he gets to not only help the families, but is able to take time to enjoy the kids and their families in the relaxing beautiful mountain setting of Transylvania.

These events just underscore the role of the family in NACD. We know that parents are the ultimate experts on their children, those most motivated to help their children, and that the family unit can be the best equipped to implement the full range of developmental and educational interventions for their children, if they have ongoing direction, guidance, and support. We at NACD feel honored and privileged to be able to support our wonderful families and to help them achieve their vision for their children.

Reprinted by permission NACD Newsletter, July 2023 ©NACD

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I am a big believer in identifying patterns, collecting data, and building new and better patterns. I would like to suggest to you parents that for a week you collect some data; try to be “normal,” don’t go out of your way to change your behavior—yet. Each day record how much quality targeted time you spend with your kids. You can include time teaching them how to mow the lawn or load the dishwasher, to teaching them how to kick a soccer ball, to talking to them about what they learned at school today, to teaching them about all the important stuff you know and care about over dinner, but to qualify you have to be talking.

After your week of collecting data, evaluate it. Because you were aware of what you were doing, your data is probably going to be a lot better than the previous weeks, but so be it. Look at your data and evaluate how well you think you did. Then think about how you could have done better and then do it. Be conscious, be aware, and strive to create new behavior patterns that provide your children with more of your life-changing attention.

Dads, you might suspect that this was largely directed at you, and you would be correct. We dads have some special power—use it!

      Reprinted by permission of The NACD Foundation, Volume 36 No. 3, 2023 ©NACD

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The war in the Ukraine keeps going on, China is making more noise about Taiwan, the kids aren’t cooperating, and how much did you pay for gas today? Looking back over the decades, it would appear that we need to accept the fact that the world is going to keep throwing challenges our way, and we need to do what we can to deal with the realities and advance in spite of them. Don’t wait for things to get better, do what you can to make your life and that of your family better—now.

As most of you know, there are some things I keep coming back to; and generally at the top of the list are family and being smart. One of the things that good times have in common with the difficult times is that the stronger our family, the better we can get through the tough times and the more we can enjoy the good times. Keep family as the priority, invest in it. The second thing on my list has a direct impact on the first—being smart. Most of us have no idea how smart we can be, or how much easier most things are the smarter we are.

Virtually every NACD family knows about processing, which equals short term memory, working memory and executive function, essentially the pieces that permit us to learn, think, and function well. They are the pieces that determine how smart we are now.

The smarter we make our kids, the better they function; and the smarter we are as adults, the better we function at every time and stage of our lives. Not a great mystery!

As you proceed to work with your kids, reserve the big rewards for advancement in processing and do your best to make it FUN! It’s the atmosphere and attitude that can make things fun for children. You can make most anything fun if it’s your goal. Mom and Dad can make sure that the kids do their processing activities, but where is your mommy to make you work on yours? She probably isn’t going to be there, so you need to step up and assume the responsibility for it and accept the challenge. 

I recently have started using a personal trainer—heck, I’m only 74, there is still time to improve. I’ve made that commitment to myself to preserve and improve the quality of my life. It’s easy as adults to see ourselves as being “fait accompli” a done deal, if you will, but that does not need to be our reality. Please, Mom and Dad, make a commitment to keep working to make yourselves better, to continue to grow, not just for your own sake, but that of your family. The better you function, the better job you can do with your children. Tools can help, and if you haven’t explored Simply Smarter then do—get smarter! It helps! Be one of those who can succeed even in the face of adversity. 

You may not be able to help the world, but you can help yours.

Reprinted by permission of The NACD Foundation, Volume 35 No.4, 2022 ©NACD

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Click above to watch the video

Please take a look at these videos (above) of my 26 month old grandson, Lachlan, doing one of his chores and learning another. This first one is a chore that he owns that helps his dad out in his office.

As I have often stated, chores are the route to independence, learning about and working with intention, responsibility, service, contribution, self-worth, attention span, development of motor skills, becoming highly capable, and on and on. Don’t underestimate what your children can do or the importance of them doing it.

Guess what this grandfather got his little grandson for Christmas? Would you believe a real metal snow shovel? This video (above) shows his first experience with it. A few lessons are needed.

I started my first business, a snow removal business, when I was eleven. I had two employees and made enough my first winter in Philadelphia to buy myself a nice boat. Don’t underestimate what your children can do. The more independent the become, the more they initiate on their own.

One of the tragedies of what most people call “education,” which has children sitting in a classroom (or for many today, looking at a computer screen) for six hours a day and then often doing homework on top of that, is that there often is not enough day or energy left for parents to teach their children about little things like values, the importance of family, or to give children time to initiate and learn to love reading and learning, or have ownership of chores, and to derive all of the benefits of them. We are producing many 20 year old narcissistic children who spent 12 or more years plugged into a curriculum that was not targeted to them, that was filled with things that they forgot within weeks, and that deprived them of the ability to learn and develop those things that are needed to turn them into successful adults.

Don’t forget about chores.
—Bob Doman

Reprinted by permission NACD Newsletter, January 2022 ©NACD

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Don’t Forget About Chores

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