by Bob Doman
After all these decades and tens of thousands of kids and families, there are a few basic things that stand out that often have great impact on how well our families and children do. A reality is that you can only accomplish a lot if you are to some degree organized and have an ongoing vision of where you are going and your priorities.
I know better than to try to make dramatic changes in your lives, so I would like to suggest one thing that I believe can have a very significant impact on how we all do.
What I am suggesting is that you discipline yourself and create a specific time between Friday and Sunday evening to do a very simple thing. This thing should only take less than ten minutes, but it can really change your outcomes, your children’s futures, and perhaps even your dispositions.
What I am suggesting is simply to sit down, perhaps after dinner on Friday evening, and review your children, your program, and your life and pick a specific thing that is going to be the One Thing* that you are going to prioritize in the coming week, and then set a goal related to it. Here are some examples of categories, possible “One Things,” and related goals:
Mom & Dad & The House
I need just a little time to take care of me.
Goal: I will get my husband to commit to watching the kids on Wednesday so I can go to a yoga class.
Mom and Dad need some time.
Goal: We need to get a babysitter on Friday night so we can have a date.
The house is a disaster and I can’t focus on getting the program done.
Goal: I will dedicate time after breakfast each day this week, even if it means I don’t get the entire program done, to get the house organized.
Kids & Program
Johnny has been close to an auditory 5 for the past month.
Goal: I’m going to make this the priority, hit this hard with intensity, and get him there this week.
I haven’t made my flashcards.
Goal: I will figure out how to take pictures with the iPad and will take enough pictures to last me for two months and send them to Costco to be printed.
We need a piece of equipment made.
Goal: I will find someone to do this for me and get it done.
Mary is ready and needs to be toilet trained.
Goal: We are going to focus on this (if necessary, to the exclusion of everything else) and get it done this week.
This is a very simple process, but if you do it, I can virtually guarantee that your lives and outcomes will improve.
I want to suggest a couple other associated things. One is the concept of don’t break the chain. There is an attached form below that you can download to use to record and keep track of your One Thing and your goals. Try to do this every week, and once you get started, think about establishing this as a new habit that can serve you for life. Do it every week and don’t miss a week. Try to build a long chain of establishing your One Thing and your focus for the week.
One last thing–start each day by making your bed, and as soon as your children are capable, have them start each day by making their beds. If you want to find out how you can change the world by making your bed, read my article and watch the video here.
* To learn more read “The One Thing – The Surprisingly Simple Truth About Extraordinary Results” by Gary Keller